Thursday, July 13, 2006

Consolidation

Remember that job interview all those months ago? Well, I had to fill up another survey from that same company again in Orchard MRT while waiting for a friend, and guess what? Two days later, and another phone call from them. Except this time I declined. I know it's the same company because I recognised the collar pin that the guy who asked me to fill out the survey was wearing.

Some things just don't change. Like the numerous people from "charities" that ask you for money at Orchard MRT. Nowadays, I just flat out say "no". I'll have to admit it was kind of funny seeing how the guy's jaw dropped because he obviously was not expecting me to be so direct. Hey, but that's what you get when people from your organisation try to make me donate more than I agree to, by putting down my name for $5 before I even say how much I'm willing to give. And yes, I know that you are "only here for a day", but I heard that line 10 months ago too.

Anyway, I realise I have not had the opportunity to consolidate my first year in Montreal, and a few days of meeting up with friends and doing the things I used to do have given me some perspective.

First of all, I realise now that it is probably time for me to move on from some aspects of the life which I left behind. A glimpse of the past served as a timely reminder. There were things that I'd hoped to accomplish, but I realise that it's not possible anymore, and that the situation has changed too. I am neither motivated nor enthusiastic.

There are also things that I still enjoy immensely. Like playing soccer for 2 and a half hours straight. Yes, I ached so bad that even walking around hurt for 2 days after, but boy was it fun. The feeling of being so carefree and in your element, the adrenaline, the banter between friends, the sheer simplicity of it all - after all these years, the charm has not faded. On the pitch, we are children once again, and the glint, the hint of mischief and glee, is evident in everyone's eyes.

Meeting up with friends whom I've not seen for months, I realise that I have grown up. Sometimes I am told that I sound more mature, at other times I notice that we've talked about similar things before, but now my responses have changed.

In Montreal, Darren, Karen, Ken, Suling and of course, Char, have been the source of much fun and laughter. Special mention goes out to Darren, who was an immense help during the last week in Montreal. The six of us grew so close we were practically family - idiosyncrasies, individual -isms, flatulence and belches all included. My stay in Montreal has allowed me to develop in ways that would not have been possible back home, and I cherish the memories that I have.

It is time to move on, and it is here that I notice the greatest change in myself. I recognise that I have to leave my friends and the good times behind much more easily now. It is still difficult, but I accept that we can't live in the past forever, and I no longer agonise over the inevitable. I probably will not find a similar group of friends next year, just like I have not found a similar group of friends to the ones that I have in Singapore, but I'm sure that next year, I'll develop another set of friendships that will carry me through. The friends that I've been lucky enough to find have been unique, and I am glad they cannot be replicated. If all friendships could be the same, then there would be no special value attached to each of them.

It has been a great year, and the memories will remain with me forever. I know that it will be different next year, but I look forward to making it unique in its own right.

2 comments:

Quixotism said...

Don't forget, you're supposed to ask people if you do say, "oh my Ggggggod,"
and, "That's so ggggggross." Because you actuallly do, it's a Tim-ism.

tim said...

I asked Darren, and he said I did. BUT I still don't think so. I like to drag the vowels on my expressions, that much I admit, but the reason I say I don't use "Oh My God" is simple. I don't because I used to be a good Catholic boy who was taught not to use that expression. I'll admit I do use it occasionally, but definitely not on a regular basis, because, strangely enough, it's still something I watch out for. Really.